Monday, October 29th

...Once a week posting is better than nothing, I suppose... more frequent than my running, these days. Is November a weird time to set resolutions? The start of a new month, the start of new routines? It is the start of DST, after all. A little lighter in the mornings, darker leaving work in the afternoons. I'm not sure how I feel about that.

I am a little uneasy about my fairly rapid use of my vacation hours at work. An hour here, two hours there. Most of them have been for medical appointments.  Now that I am doing all of my diabetes-related care in Dubuque, the work day time suck is even greater. Que sera, sera, I guess. Though this Friday I am using a personal choice day to travel to Ely, Minnesota to the International Wolf Center to meet the wolves, do work projects and generally geek out with wolf-related awesomeness. :) The drive will most likely suck, but I hear the area is gorgeous and the weekend should be memorable. Another solo adventure for this gal. I return late Sunday night, only to turn around first thing Monday to come to work early so I can get in as much work time as possible before once again journeying to Dubuque to see the diabetes educator and dietitian there. At least this trip should involve some discussion/comparison/demonstration of an insulin pump, which will give me more flexibility.

However, even though I do like Dr. Iverson, my new endocrinologist, nor does it hurt that he's a good-looking guy, he did not think antibodies testing to verify my type of diabetes was particularly helpful or necessary. Which rather took me aback, for I thought that was precisely the reason for which I was seeing him.  Apparently, it would not affect the current treatment.  More troubling than that is he effectively said though the diagnosis leans towards Type 1, I still could very well be Type 2. If I do everything correctly and all of a sudden I need very little insulin, we might do the testing to verify Type 2. Or if I really want to know.  In the moment, I took his word and didn't press the issue. But even driving away, I decided I want to know. I really want to know. And the more I think about it, the more frustrated I am that he took what seems such an important distinction so lightly.  Everywhere I turn, from seeking advice on how to cope, to discounts on my testing strips, there is a question about which type.  I don't know. I have no idea. And he muddied the water more than it was. Frankly, Type 2 is still more of an emotional hurdle than Type 1.  I verified with my insurance that they would cover the test 100% if it is in network. I have refrained from calling and telling him, waiting to ask about it at my appointment next Monday.  But it essentially it means another six weeks of wondering.


I am, however, getting better at this lowered blood glucose thing. Still far from perfect, but I can even get into double digits now. The good news from Dr. Iverson is that he felt my numbers, however imperfect, were right on target for where they should be, considering I'd only been using two types of insulin for 3 weeks. I had to stop and think about that. Only 3 weeks? Really? Feels like an eternity already. He upped my Levemir dose just slightly, which seems to help, but I do wonder if that's less about the increased Levemir or generally just improving my overal blood glucose numbers. In the seven days since I've seen him (week four of using both insulins), I've tested by blood glucose 30 times, and have only been over 200 4 times. For comparison, in the week prior I tested 34 times, with 12 instances above 200. That's 13% versus 35%.  Granted, that includes my weekend out tailgating and eating out, but improvement is improvement!

Though I need to find a way to stop emotionally beating myself up when my numbers are not what I want. The target is 150 or lower, per Dr. Iverson and Liz Hinckley, my nurse practitioner in Lancaster. By the same data used above (30 tests/current week, 34 tests previous week), I had 14 tests at 151 or lower (3 more not included at 153, 154, and 156) this week, and only 7 the previous week. That's 47% versus 21%. I know this seems excessively nit-picky of me, but actually it's rather helpful to see the mathematical comparisons this way. I really am getting better at it, not just feeling like it.

To quote a Calvin and Hobbes strip, "Promotions for everyone!"